Wednesday, May 6, 2015

one year!

When I say that i've been married for a year, it sounds just as strange and surreal as my actual wedding day. A blur, really. Like it's not my life? I don't even know how to explain it, but it's weird.
Anyway, it's been a great year! Great but crazy with tons of changes that if I had to face them alone it would be a doozy and too much to handle. The whole Maryland fiasco, student teaching, getting a job, etc. I'm so grateful my first year of marriage was this one!
Anyway, I have been thinking about everything I have learned this year. To Mark's dismay, it hasn't been picking up my shoes after I take them off.  I used to hate when people wrote about how they were experts about marriage when they hadn't been married very long. However, I know now that those people know more than someone who hasn't been married at all. 
So that being said, here are some things i've learned: 
-The one minute rule will save your life and your marriage.
-Go grocery shopping, even when neither of you want to go. Just get it done.
-Don't set up furniture together. Ever.
-Be very specific and vocal about what you want, how you are feeling, etc. Communication is as important as everybody says it is.
-Go on vacations. Don't think about money, you'll pay it off eventually. That's my pretty dumb but also brilliant advice. We have done a lot and are officially debt free so I might have sooomme credibility? But also probably not. 
-Invest in the following the second you get engaged: King bed, two twin duvets, earplugs and breathe right strips. I didn't sleep for the first like six months of marriage and I was not a nice person.
-You will gain weight. You will gain weight even if you don't marry an asian and double your rice intake. Sign up for a gym when you get engaged and hate yourself a little less.
-Share family time during the holidays. Or figure out a plan well in advance so everyone is on the same page. 
-Be individuals. The first little bit I got really lost in the fact that I was connected to another person and I had to realize that we could still be individuals as well as married. We like to do different things and it's totally ok to do that. 
-Peeing with the door closed is super overrated. 
-Know how much is in your bank account. I'm really bad at this which is unfortunate because i'm somewhat in charge of the money. I always know that there is about this much. However a lot of stressy situations could have been avoided if I would have been better at this.
-If your wife is anything like me, don't put her in charge of the money
-Get your priorities straight
-Be open to trying mayo instead of miracle whip, as well as sleeping without a top sheet.
-Don't accidentally throw your birth control in the garbage
-Watch a TV series that neither of you have seen together. Then feel the betrayal when one of you watches without the other. (sorrrrrry Mark)
-Go to bed angry! Everyone always tells you not to do that which is total crap, at least for us. If we go to bed angry, 99% of the time we wake up not remembering what we were fighting about, why we were so mad or what side we were on.
-Find something you can do together. Mark and I have taken up disk golf since there is a really nice course by our house. It's nice to have something to do together.
I'm sure there is a lot more. Marriage was kind of a doozy for me, I am basically an only child who was really used to being alone and spending whatever money I wanted. It's so good that marriage came along and made me a better person, seriously. 
Since I love picture montages...check out Mark and I through the ages!

Mark and I met in high school. You can read more about that here. He took me to my senior ball!

We got lucky and both of us decided to go to USU. You can read about that here. This is Mark and I on his 19th birthday. 

Mark went to Thailand on his LDS mission. While he was gone I realized I really loved him. You can read about that here.

We started dating on a "trial basis" after he had been home for a few months. I had gone to Boston to clear my head and when I got back I knew it was go time. Post about that here.

We dated for almost two years! Dating was super awesome. I loved it. Here is a post I wrote on our 1 year dating anniversary. If you are tired of reading sentimental stuff, go to that post.

On February 10th, 2014 Mark gave me the biggest shock of my life and proposed to me! Here is the post about that.

On May 6th, 2014 we got married in the Salt Lake Temple. Here are the posts about the wedding. ONE TWO

The next day we got in the car and drove to Baltimore, MD where we would be living for the summer to do summer sales. First, we got on a cruise ship that took us to the Bahamas!

Living in Maryland was the biggest trial of my life but now that all our friends have gone back this summer I miss it absolutely terribly. 

We came back to Utah and had an extremely poor semester while I was student teaching. Now we have gotten adjusted to our new life and new schedules while Mark is working, going to school and while I am working like 55 hours a week. We are truly living the dream! Haha, but really.

I don't get mushy a lot, mostly because I know a majority of people dislike reading about happiness, especially on social media. It's true. Statistics prove it to be true. However I love Mark like I have never loved anybody and never will. I can't understand how he can work so hard, do so much and then not kill me when I leave cereal and milk in the bowl and it gets all hard and weird. That's true love.
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  1. aaaaaaaa I loved this post. you guys have done so much this past year, it's crazy! relationship goals lol! i guess i'm coming up on a year w/ my guy too, it is pretty weird. does 1-year-old frozen cake taste as bad as everyone says it does?

    1. Thank you so much! You guys have done so much too!
      Our cake was alright, not disgusting at all. But absolutely not as good as our wedding day!!

  2. I love everything about this post! The advice about going grocery shopping even when you don't feel like it - so true! haha there were a couple times in our first year of marriage were we literally ran out of every food item in our kitchen.
    And I did a post just like this two weeks ago! ha you're welcome to check it out. ;)

  3. social media should be happiness. happy one year! and yes, communication is SO IMPORTANT. i swear, if you just tell people what you want from them life will be 100% better lol.